The Value of Un-Labeling: How Surprise Soup Taught Me to Let Go of Expectations
Expect the unexpected—for life is a wonderful surprise.
I watched as my mother peeled the labels off every can of soup in our cupboard and tucked them carefully into an envelope with a contest form. I never knew what the winner received, but I knew it meant food. We were a humble family, and Mom entered every contest that crossed her path—each one a small act of hope.
Every time the doorbell rang, I believed—truly believed—I’d be greeted by Ed McMahon from Publishers Clearing House, holding a giant check that would finally rescue our family from coupons, sweepstakes, and soup can contests.
But he never came.
What did come was something else—something quieter and just as powerful:
The lesson that hope isn’t always loud. Sometimes, it’s a woman peeling labels off cans because she refuses to give up.
I don’t have a photo of what that looked like because film and cameras were luxuries we couldn’t afford. But the image is vivid in my mind.
One night, my mom asked me to grab a can of soup from the cabinet.
I opened the door, stared at the rows of silver cylinders, and gasped,
“They’re all naked!”
“It’s a surprise dinner!” I declared, wide-eyed and delighted.
She came over, leaned beside me, and with a gentle sigh—the only sign of her frustration—stood still for a moment, gazing at the naked soup cans. They were each lined up neatly in the yellow pull-out shelves, once alphabetized: Beef Broth, Chicken Noodle, Cream of Mushroom, Tomato, and Vegetable.
But now, the order no longer mattered. The labels were gone. The rules had changed.
I didn’t know if I’d end up with a plain bowl of soup or a meal built around it.
But in that moment, something subtle and powerful happened:
Mom let go of the label, and I let go of expectation.
She offered a faint smile, eyes scanning the unlabeled cans. Slowly, she reached in, selected one, and with quiet faith, turned the opener.
“Mushroom Soup—my favorite!” I exclaimed, joy rising in my voice.
Mushroom soup was amazing to me.
It could stand alone as a whole meal or become part of something more.
It paired easily—with potatoes, with chicken, or simply in a bowl by itself.
Mushroom soup was like me, full of possibility. Endless in what it could become.
Should we eat it as is, or turn it into something more with the chicken in the fridge? The decision was easy. We made a meal and took our time enjoying cooking it and eating.
That night wasn’t just about dinner.
It was about trust, presence, and the quiet, sacred surprise of surrender—and connection.
In a world overwhelmed by headlines, disconnection, and the constant pressure to define ourselves, maybe the most radical act we can take is this:
Un-labeling.
What does it mean to un-label?
Un-labeling is the gentle art of peeling away the identities we cling to—the ones that offer structure but sometimes box us in.
We wear them like armor, or badges of survival:
Mother. Father. Daughter. Son. Sister. Brother.
Spouse. Significant other. Single. Divorced. Caregiver.
Executive. Freelancer. Stay-at-home parent. Volunteer.
Fixer. Leader. Survivor. Overachiever. Helper.
And then there are the quiet, often invisible labels we carry deep inside:
Trauma Survivor. Diabetic. Epileptic. Chronically ill. Neurodivergent. Anxious.
These labels help the world make sense of us.
But they are not the whole of us.
Un-labeling doesn’t mean denial or erasure.
It means making room for more.
It invites us to ask:
Who am I when the titles fall away?
Who am I beyond my diagnosis?
Who am I when I stop trying to be everything for everyone?
And what helps us do that?
The tools of un-labeling are curiosity and empathy.
Curiosity asks: What more is here? What might I discover about myself—or someone else—if I look beyond the surface?
Empathy answers: I’m willing to witness your truth, even if it challenges how I’ve labeled you or myself.
Together, curiosity and empathy gives us permission to grow.
They help us shed assumptions, soften our judgments, and stay open to the mystery of who we are becoming.
At our core...
When we release the stories and labels we’ve held so tightly, we create space for something more generous to unfold:
Surprise. Healing. Presence. Peace.
At our core, we are breath, body, and story—
longing for a singular purpose:
To connect.
To connect with the Universe.
To connect with each other.
To connect with ourselves.
Our stories are powerful reminders of who we are.
And we have the choice—to share them with others or simply with ourselves—in ways that feel empowering or not.
It’s easy to look back on painful moments and let them define us.
But growth begins when we choose to see the moments of connection, love, and trust, even in the smallest details.
The memory of that dinner with my mom isn’t just about soup.
It’s a treasured imprint of love—quiet, unexpected, and lasting.
We are stories still unfolding.
And sometimes, all it takes is a kitchen full of unlabeled soup cans to remind us:
Life’s most meaningful moments aren’t always planned, they’re chosen, one mystery at a time.
But here’s a question worth sitting with:
What if one day you woke up, and all of those labels were gone?
No titles. No roles. No diagnoses. No expectations.
Who would you be?
How would your life shift?
Would you breathe more deeply?
Love more freely?
Show up more truthfully?
Maybe, just maybe, without the pressure to be someone specific,
you could finally become someone authentic.
You can’t change everything.
But you do have the gift of choice.
You can choose to keep wearing the labels...
Or you can show up naked, like the cans—vulnerable, unmarked, and open—
and surprise yourself with how every day will unfold.
So how will you un-label today?
How will you connect with who you really are—
and surprise yourself as you become…
YOU.
To My Mom—
Thank you for making me who I am: kind, compassionate, and loving.
It is your essence and love that flows through me.
I’ve worked hard to rid myself of limiting labels
and like you, I sometimes sigh…
but I always move forward with grace and dignity.
From my heart to yours—I love you.
Wonderful! You’re a terrific writer and I loved every word💖